Friday, April 1, 2011

Video games (said with disgust and eye rolling)

Sometimes I have dreams about video games. I'm trapped in one and people are shooting at me, they don't really have anything against me, they're just bored and I'm wearing something that says "Kill me, it's fun and you can get points that are pointless (PUN!)!", so it's not like I can apologize while I'm running away or try to reason with them, they're just having some fun.

I AM NOT A GAMER. I want to make that clear before I continue, because some scary things are starting to happen, things I'm not proud of, but I need the therapy of blogging to help move past. (I don't think my bf is a gamer, but he does play a couple nights a week so I'm keeping a close eye on the developing situation, I'd hate to declare a no fly zone in certain rooms. )

Most of the time I leave when he's been playing for to long (about 10 mins or so, I'm a really strong person), but other times I'm engrossed in something else and don't want to lose my focus because I saw something shiny when I got up ( sometimes it's just WAY to cold to go outside) so I stay and he plays.

I definitely hear enough that I can quickly recognize what he's playing without being in the room and I now actually understand some of his game references and jokes. I'm not proud of this but it's happened and I'm trying to move on, I think I could have over looked my scary newfound game knowledge if one simple thing hadn't happened.

I made a joke. A video game joke. Not one about how dumb boys and/or their video games are and/or how boys with video games are not human any more, but I made an honest to gosh reference a "you had to play the game" to get it joke. I don't remember what it was exactly, I black out a little and start twitching (sometimes I droll a little, or so I've been told, I'm blacked out I don't know ) when I think about it to hard, but it happened and I deeply DEEPLY regret it. I fear I may never be the same again.

I don't really know where I'm going with this post, none of them really have a point or a conclusion so that's nothing new, but I'd like to start wrapping things up with neat little bows, maybe some sage and awe inspiring words, something sentimental or witty. I  also really like wrapping gifts, it's fun, and I like having a pretty box to display pre-gift pillage (see how I'm trying to distract from all my shame in the rest of this post?).

Well, I guess at least he's not one of those tools with the head phones that yell at people during the game and get SUPER into.Like so into it you want to ask them their address and find out their medical history in case they  have a flippin aneurysm or a heart  attack or maybe they have a blocked artery that is about to explode (I've fallen off the wagon again and have been surfing Web MD, I either have a hangnail or an embolism of the toe) so you want to be as helpful as possible when you call 911 for them.

He just came in to tell me about how he pushed a guy off a cliff in a game and that it was  super awesome, I heard him laugh from a separate room for like 5 minutes. I need to go to the situation room and review this latest intelligence.

UPDATE: Turns out he hasn't been playing most of the night he's just been messing with people to make them mad. I'm gonna go get out BigShotShooter03's emergency contact list, might be making some calls tonight

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