Ok, so I'm pretty much just waddling around a lot and obsessing about the ridiculous now that I'm 9 months pregnant.
The latest way that I've convinced myself that I'm going to hurt my unborn son in the final moments comes from sending out thank you notes. How can thank you notes hurt my unborn child you may ask? He can't get a paper cut, he's protected by manner layers of tissue and blubber. Will he get carpel tunnel from writing so many? His writing skills aren't quit developed yet, so I'm doing all of that.
Nope, I'm pretty sure something bad will happen because I have consumed a large amount of paste while licking the backs of the envelopes. You would think that baby shower thank you notes would have a disclaimer to let you know that pregnant women shouldn't use them! What if my kid comes out with three arms now or an IQ of 5 because his mother became a paste eater!!!
Maybe he'll just be really into arts and crafts? With three arms he'd be really efficient at them.